Ohio abortions on the decline

I read the headline, Ohio abortions decline, and I thought, "great news." 

But then I read the article. 

According to the article published in The Columbus Dispatch, "In 2007, 30,859 pregnancies were terminated, down more than 6 percent from the previous year and the lowest number since the state began keeping statistics in 1976. A report by the Ohio Department of Health shows abortions have been declining since 2000, when 38,140 were performed."

Wait, did I read that right? Over 30,000? Just in the state of Ohio? Holy smokes! That is a crazy-high number!

Here are some of the facts:

• About 1 in 8 abortions were performed on women younger than 20.
• Women with at least one child accounted for 60 percent of abortions.
• Eighty-two percent of the abortions were performed on unmarried women.
• Women between the ages of 20 and 24 accounted for a third of abortions, more than any other age group.
• Eighty-six percent of abortions were performed before the 12th week of pregnancy.
• Ohio continues to have a lower rate of abortions than the national average.
• Although Ohio statistics are not available, national figures show that unintended pregnancies are increasing among lower-income women while decreasing among higher-income women.
• Nationally, those with a high-school diploma or less underwent nearly two-thirds of the procedures.

So what do you make of all this? I think it is wonderful that abortions are on the decline, but to know that my state still performs over 30,000 abortions every year? Well, we have a LONG way to go.

TV, Teens, & Sex

According to a recent study published in Pediatrics, the official journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, teenagers’ exposure to sexual content on TV is linked to teen pregnancies. The study found that teens exposed to high levels of sexual content on television were twice as likely to be involved in a pregnancy in the following three years as teens with limited exposure.

The study's lead author cautioned that exposure to TV is not the only factor relating to teen pregnancies. She stated, “we don’t think that [TV] is necessarily more significant than some of the family and neighborhood factors that can lead to teen pregnancies. But even when we removed all the other factors, we still saw a compelling link between a high exposure to sexual content on television and teen pregnancies.”

Additionally, the study's abstract states: 

This is the first study to demonstrate a prospective link between exposure to sexual content on television and the experience of a pregnancy before the age of 20. Limiting adolescent exposure to the sexual content on television and balancing portrayals of sex in the media with information about possible negative consequences might reduce the risk of teen pregnancy. Parents may be able to mitigate the influence of this sexual content by viewing with their children and discussing these depictions of sex.

It seems that I continue to be made aware of research challenging my decision to let my son watch TV. As for now, I limit his TV exposure as best I can, and as he matures, I intend on having some very honest conversations with him about what he sees on TV, on the computer, in magazines, and anywhere else that the media is present. I believe that is ultimately the best that we can do as parents - talk to our kids. It is impossible to protect them from everything, but it is very possible to talk to them about anything.

Too sexy Halloween

With Halloween only a day away, many parents are scurrying to find their child a costume for the holiday. But their shopping might prove to be especially challenging as many of the costumes available are too sexy for their young one(s). 

Author and professor Diane Levin recently spoke with the Los Angeles Times about this concern.
Halloween costumes for 7- and 8-year-old girls and even younger have become downright titillating, and for tweens and teens, the vast majority of those sold in stores and on the Internet are unabashedly sexually alluring.
Little girls and their big sisters are being encouraged to get dressed up, in many cases, like child prostitutes. Then, they wander the night judging and being judged by their friends as to how well they meet the provocative standard and begging for candy from strangers.
This is a continuation of what's been going on for quite a while: Halloween costumes are reflecting an increasingly sexualized childhood.

So what is a parent to do?

Simply put, say NO!

Levin put it this way:

Say you go to a store with your 8-year-old and she's trying to get a sexy costume and you're insisting on something more wholesome. It's becoming a battle. You need to stop and ask, "What do you like about that costume?" She may say, "Jenny and Susie all have something like that and they'll think I'm a dork if I don't." And then you say, "But my concern is that that looks like a costume for an older person. It seems we need to find a costume where you feel OK and I feel OK. How about this one -- which looks a little sexy to me but I feel OK with it?"
The idea is to let kids know we're there, we hear them, we're going to influence what they're learning. But we're also going to respect their thinking. So when kids need our help, they're more likely to come to us.

I'm a big fan of this - talk to your child, listen to your child, respect your child, and try to find compromise. Sure, you might end up putting your foot down, but at least have a conversation with your child first. There is a lot both parent and child can learn from these situations, and ultimately, we want our children to be safe and to understand the importance of our concern(s) for them.

Planned Parenthood: Not Recommended.

Abortion has and always will be a hot topic surrounded by an enormous amount of debate, and I am extremely hesitant as I consider leaving this post knowing that the word alone is enough to fire people up. But I have a thing or two to say regarding this issue, so at the risk of stirring the pot, here I go.

The abortion debate is making headlines in my state of Ohio as the Ohio Supreme Court is called to determine whether or not Planned Parenthood systematically ignored evidence of abuse against girls who visited Planned Parenthood's 37 Ohio clinics for abortions. These allegations stem from a 2004 case when "a 14-year-old girl showed up at a Cincinnati abortion clinic accompanied by a 21-year-old who was not her relative." The 14-year-old went to a Planned Parenthood clinic with her 21-year-old soccer coach who had impregnated her. The girl identified him as her step-brother, and she gave the clinic her coach's number saying it was her father's. The coach used his credit card to pay for the abortion. The coach was later convicted of seven counts of sexual battery.
The fact that Planned Parenthood fell for the ruse suggests that its staff and doctors are willing to overlook evidence of abuse. Planned Parenthood approved the child for the abortion overlooking several red flags that should have caused them to suspect statutory rape.

I'm not going to further discuss this issue because it disgusts me to no end. But the story did spark a desire in me to better understand the parent consent laws in my state (they vary from state to state).

In the State of Ohio, a minor must receive parental consent in order to receive an abortion. It's very hard for me to believe that this consent can be given over the phone, but as in the case cited above, it happens - wow. 

While researching this issue, I came across a resource developed by Planned Parenthood for teens: teenwire.com. I really want to support a resource that offers teens sex education because I believe that talking with our kids about sex is important. But Planned Parenthood's site rubs me the wrong way. They throw out phrases such as, "the best way to protect yourself is to get a prescription from a health center or private health care provider before an accident happens," and "most women, in the long-term, experience feelings of relief after they have an abortion." Um, excuse me? The best way to protect yourself is called ABSTINENCE. Who are these yahoos? I'm not a proponent of abstinence-only education, but let's get real here, it is the only surefire way to avoid STD's and pregnancy. Geesh. And what about this "relief after an abortion" b.s.? Sure, I imagine that there is an element of relief that many women experience, but the women that I know who have had an abortion struggle continuously with that decision. And by continuously, I mean they have struggled for YEARS.

I wish that I could support Planned Parenthood's efforts, but I'm so disappointed by their pro-abortion and pro-sex philosophies. Sure, they can argue that they present facts and education, but anyone who has a brain can see that what they present is hardly unbiased. 

I want to believe that Planned Parenthood offers young women with everything that they need during such a difficult time: facts, counseling, prayer, resources, love, support, truth. But sadly, my research leads me to believe that they don't. 

The battle of the sexy

Childhood development experts Diane E. Levin, Ph.D., and Jean Kilbourne, Ed.D., offer parents an essential guide to protecting their kids from a sexualized childhood, in their book, So Sexy So Soon. The authors address a monster attacking our children's innocence: the media. Not only is it our obsession with sex that is damaging our young people, but our media-rich culture is drowning our children in sex, sex, sex, and more sex. 

The book offers the reader with suggestions, sample dialogues, stories, and resources for parents who want to address this sensitive topic with their children. Some of these tips can be found on the book's website. I have highlighted several and added my comments:

• Work with your children to develop rules and routines about their TV watching and media use. Involving children in the decision-making process benefits them greatly. It teaches them how to make decisions and how to compromise, and it boosts their self-confidence as they experience a sense of investment in the decision made.
  
• Get beyond just saying “no.” Yes, "no" is the easy answer, but think of what children gain when provided with an explanation and not just "because I said so." 
  
• Establish safe channels of communication with children & Be willing to listen, do not rush in with judgments or advice. Allow your [child] to voice their own opinions and make their own decisions. Is there anything quite as valuable to a child as being able to talk to his/her mom or dad without feeling judged or ashamed? 
  
• Try to take your child’s point of view and see the world through his or her eyes. We learn so much from young people when we understand their perspective.
• Point out examples of males and females who are doing a broad range of activities, not just the limited range that children so often see in the media & Challenge assumptions about gender by asking your daughter to help repair something or asking your son to help cook and clean up. I am a firm supporter of breaking gender stereotypes. Let's embrace our children no matter what they want to do or be, and let's try to disrupt their desire to conform to the media's portrayal of what a man or woman should be and look like.
  
• Work cooperatively with other adults & Model healthy intimate relationships. Our children learn so much by watching us. Help them to see positive and healthy relationships by modeling them in your life.
  
• Get to know the parents of your [child's] friends. This helps gain perspective on your own parental experience, and fosters a feeling of safety to know where your [child] is and whom he/she is with & Get to know your [child's] friends. Allow them to feel comfortable spending time at your house by creating a [child]-friendly environment in which an adult can be present without hovering. This not only gives us a have a leg-up on what are children are doing, but it also provides us with a network of other adults who are working in the best interest of our children.
  
• Do not allow computers and televisions in your [child's] bedroom. Have them use these items in a family or common room where you can occasionally glance at what they are watching on TV or websites they are visiting online. There is no good reason for a child to have access to these things in the privacy of their bedroom. Honestly, I cannot think of one good reason.
• Share values and expectations with your teen. If you disapprove of your teen being sexually active, say so and give reasons why. Yes, these can be scary conversations, but these are exactly the kinds of conversations that we should be having with our children. We cannot assume that other people are talking to our children about sex in positive and productive ways. We are the parents - that is our job.
• Encourage a broad range of interests and skills in your teen, and focus on compassion, kindness, perseverance, rather than how they look. This is a huge self-confidence builder. There is nothing more dangerous than a teen girl with low self-esteem mixed with a teen boy wanting to explore his sexual desires. If this girl doesn't feel good about herself, there is a great chance that she will succumb to the boy's desire in order to make herself feel loved and accepted.
• Let your [child] know that conflict is inevitable in close relationships and teach ways to resolve conflict peacefully. Ahhh, conflict resolution. If we can teach children how to resolve conflicts peacefully, think of what a better world this would be.

Teen girls and sex: Whose to blame?

A friend recently shared this article with me, The Truth About Teen Girls, released by Time.com. The article focuses on the presence of sex in the lives of teenage girls today. But unlike many recent publications, the article addresses the appearance of sexiness put on by many young women as opposed to the actual sexiness of these young women. In other words, are our teenage girls overtly sexual or do they just want to appear that way?

The article points out that since 1991, the rate of pregnancies among teen girls is trending downward. This doesn't mean that sex isn't a problem among our young women, but it does force researchers to approach this issue from different angles and perspectives. One report by the American Psychological Association (2007) suggests that are youngest adolescents are not experiencing sexiness when they dress sexy, rather they experience a desire to look older. In other words, a nine-year-old girl might see certain actresses dressing sexy and think, "I want to look like her because she is older than me and she is cool." So rather than slapping on a mini-skirt because it is "sexy," the young girl dresses provacatively because she thinks that it makes her look older and cooler.

Unfortunately, the sexy images portrayed in the media are about the only images that our young girls are seeing. With the exception of a few positive media campaigns such as Dove's Campaign for Real Beauty and Girls Inc., most of our young girls are digesting media images that hinder a girl's self-confidence. 

Time's article highlights one suggestion made by Gigi Durham, author of The Lolita Effect: provide children as early as kindergarten with media-literacy classes to teach them how to dissect and understand the pervasive aspects of their environment. This is especially important because our children are raised in a "sex sells" culture. Imagine if our children were exposed to a media that wasn't trying to sell anything. And imagine what such media-literacy education could do for our girls by the time they are facing adolescence.

The article ends by challenging its readers to think about the not-so-pleasant reality that WE are at fault for this "sexual epidemic" and our children are merely the victims (like in Nabokov's book Lolita, Lolita was the victim). With child-pornography on the rise (and it's not the teens using it), adults are to blame for this sex-obsessed culture. We are the ones that freaked out when Miley Cyrus posed half-nude on a magazine cover, not our children. As the article points out, "when tweens see a picture of Cyrus with her back bare and her hair tousled, they don't see her as postcoital. That's an adult interpretation."

Maybe if we discovered how to contain our obsession with sex, we could stop the cycle of actual sexiness and perceived sexiness among our young people. Because let's face it, we can't expect our young girls to behave any differently if we continue to behave so much worse.

Not funny

Sunday night on the MTV Video Music Awards, a British celebrity made several jokes about a group of young men and their choice to remain abstinent before marriage. I don't have a lot to say about this because, quite frankly, I think most people would agree that a young person should be commended for their choice to remain pure. Making fun of a group of young men for such a commendable decision demonstrates a lack of intelligence. Honestly, this guy thinks that making fun of kids' virginity is funny? Then again, maybe I shouldn't be surprised at all. This was on MTV, after all. Don't get me wrong. I am part of the MTV generation, and believe it or not, MTV has done a lot to educate young people on sexual health. But they are known for crossing the line. It's just a shame because it wasn't so much that a line was crossed but that an obviously ignorant man was given a platform to showcase his idiocy.